


Angel Sets the Record Straight

by Hello_Spikey



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-16
Updated: 2010-03-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 13:57:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17809241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hello_Spikey/pseuds/Hello_Spikey
Summary: For the "Vampire Mythbusters" prompt.





	Angel Sets the Record Straight

**Author's Note:**

> Just a silly thing.

**1\. How I learned Tai Chi**  
  
People are always asking me about my trips to the orient and what masters I must have studied with. Uh... I have been to China, Japan, Tibet, and many other places in Asia, but you guys don't honestly believe a vampire can just walk up to a martial arts master and ask for a quick course? I mean, now that I've learned a few things, I do get into discussions with instructors who are always happy...  
  
I digress. The truth is: Learn Tai Chi in 80 Days, the video series. They started selling those in the late 70s. And no matter what Spike says, I did not get betamax.  
  
 **2\. Vampire Staying Power**  
  
I try my best to be a thoughtful and caring lover. I do. It's important to me to satisfy my partner. (Maybe moreso because it wasn't all that important to me for those soulless years.) But the things you guys write about vampire libido - it's, well, frankly it's intimidating. I have enough on my mind, shutting out the fantasies of ripping flesh into chunks and...  
  
Can we forget I said that last bit?  
  
 **3\. The Mysterious Stranger Schtick**  
  
I was not trying to impress Buffy by dropping in, spouting cryptic hints, and disappearing, as certain friends of hers have recently implied to me. The fact is I just hadn't had much experience talking to people at that point. I mean, I was pretty much a shut-in for a hundred years. So it took most of the day to decide to go talk to her, and then I had to find her, and then... there was the talking. And my carefully-rehearsed "The Annointed One is coming into town at 3:15 and plans to kill you. By the way, he looks like a little kid" turns into "There's some serious stuff going down tonight." Is it any wonder why I run away after that?  
  
 **4\. Hair Gel**  
  
One handful of LA Looks Light Hold does not a hair gel addiction make. I have one bottle. It's a pump dispenser. Vampires can't check their hair in mirrors so I just like to know I don't have fly-aways, okay? Spike uses way, way more hair gel than me. He's a menace to the hair care industry.


End file.
